Sad emoji.

When people are sad, we all have our different things we do. We eat ice cream to get over a boy, we listen to sad songs because the people singing them know how we feel, we isolate ourselves because we already feel alone. I have a playlist of sad songs that always make me cry. Why? Because I was moping after a breakup when I made it. There is a time to grieve, but do not forget that there is also a time to be happy. 

Do not allow yourself to grieve for too long. It's unhealthy. Ice cream will make you fat, sitting alone does not make things better, and there are more people than the artists who sing sad songs who know what you may be going through. Life goes on, so why let it keep going on without you while you are stuck in this perpetual sorrow for whatever it is that happened to you. Phone a friend, put on a happy playlist, force yourself to use the smiley face emoji, just start laughing. Yes, things can make you sad, but life is better when you choose to be happy. Ultimately, it is a decision you have to make for yourself. Maybe some of you fine-feathers friends are lucky enough to have friends that will snap you out of it, so you will not have to make that choice. Keep those people around, and be that friend to others. Looking back at low moments that I have had in high school, I appreciate them. No, they were definitely not fun at the time, too many tears were shed and I did waste too much time dwelling on things, but they made me appreciate the good times so much more. Expect that your high school career will consist of both high points and low points, it would be a pretty boring dollar coaster without them.

JSL

Sharks.

Sometimes, high school feels like you are floating in an ocean just waiting to see where you end up. Often times, you feel as if you need a life-preserver, yet there is open water all around, and you must find the strength you did not have to keep yourself afloat. You might think that the longer you are exposed to this new terrain, the better you get at it. However, this is not the case because high school has new challenges hidden behind every wave.

Treading water is exhausting. Above everything else, not being able to take a break is one of the hardest things about it. Life preservers do come, every once in a while, falling off of ships labeled "snow days" or "summer break". Life preservers only last so long, never long enough as it always seems, but you should be grateful for them. They help you float but what they cannot protect you from, is the vast, unknown, immensity that lies underneath you. 

Sharks for instance. Just as deadly by itself as it is when followed by others. They feed not only on your fear, but also your tears, your feelings of hopelessness, and your struggling to keep afloat. These sharks are very intimidating. They are good at being what they are, sharks. They have to be, in order for them to maintain their control in the sea. They are able to get inside your mind, making you question every single move you make. Terrifying you into believing that any move you make might be the last, forcing you to be still while they circle you. In the moment, sharks seem as if they will never go away. However, as crazy as this sounds, they do get bored and move on. The best shark repellent that I have found so far comes in a can labeled "just start laughing", in case you ever feel as if you are the shark bait this week.

JSL

Wolves.

The advice from every senior to the freshmen. Three years ago, when I was a bright-eyed freshmen, I ate up every word the seniors would say. They had been here in this school for four years, they had to know what they were talking about. Right? So I listened. I did my homework, I never questioned superiority, and I got involved.

With everything.

The administration gladly supported their advice. Every year they preach the same words of wisdom to the freshmen, "Get involved!" 

"Clubs, sports, music, drama, speech, THAT'S A DO!"

"And let us not forget to stress the importance of how fantastic it is to take as many AP classes as you can," the administrators thought to themselves. 

Then there was me, sitting there, watching the announcements, thinking this was the place where I could do everything. Kennedy had managed to make the impossible, possible. 

Off I went, joint show choir and band and then diving and then one acts and then speech and then track and I took an AP class and I joined student government. Sleep was for the weak. I was expected to do everything, so I did. Freshmen year went by and at times it was hard, but I survived. Sophomore year I took a more rigorous course and school itself got harder, as was expected, but everyone else was sleep deprived and struggling, it was normal. Right? Junior year came, the most important year they say, and along came two jobs on top of my schedule. 

That was the tipping point. 

When the time comes and you grow old and wise and become a senior, give meaningful advice. If you tell students to get involved, list the consequences. Do not just throw them to the wolves. The stress, anxiety, and sleep deprivation, claws and bites just as wolves would. Remind them that the best weapons they have against wolves are organization and responsibility, and maybe they will survive with less scars than we came out with. 

JSL

Decisions.

You are in high school now. You are almost legally an adult. You have a couple of years left living at home. You still have to ask to use the restroom. You might be scared. You should be. 

All we have been taught throughout high school is to obey. Whether it is the teachers who tell you what to study, how to do math problems or how to behave, to your peers who ultimately decide what decisions you make socially. When are we supposed to learn how to think for ourselves? Our parents are doing their job when they tell us what to do, but sometimes when we attempt to make a decisions and they are the wrong ones, we face the consequences. We get shunned at school for doing something everyone else does not approve of. We get yelled at for speaking our mind in class by the teacher. Rather than being open-minded and optimistic, we become robots controlled by those who surround us, giving them the authority to determine our decisions. Whenever we make a choice of our own, we cower and just wait for it to explode. However, out of all of this, we are supposed to become free thinkers of our own. You think you are going to decide what college you want to go to? Think again. Oh wait, we cannot do that by ourselves yet, let me raise my hand first.

JSL

Leadership.

In presidential elections, candidates run on a platform of change. As my government teacher always says,"No one will vote for someone, if their platform is that they are gonna run the country just like the last guy did." Their logos revolve all around the ideas of 'reform' and 'change' because that is what people want to do when they are put in charge. When one is given a leadership role their goal is to make things better than they were. If they only want the position for the title, they will not be a well liked leader because change is what people expect.

Because we live in a democratic society, people usually elect their leaders. There are also plenty of situations where people with leadership qualities rise to the top because of the situations they are presented with need someone to take charge. However, these individuals have less stress placed on them from others, because no one elected them, but they may place expectations on themselves.

As someone who has recently been elected to be in a leadership role, I can tell you it is extremely honoring and humbling, It was also very nerve-racking, because I have recently been struggling with balancing all of the things on my schedule I have this year, how will I be able to manage a whole team next year? I am no president, but there were so many things that came to my mind revolving around change and what I myself could do to better the team. How could I pass up this opportunity? I see myself as a rather out going and personable person and I want people to remember me for that, so what better opportunity to do that than accept my elected position as a captain of the Swimming and Diving team at Kennedy High School.

My name is Jayden Lovell and I approve this message.

Worth.

There is a price for everything, every good you buy has a price to keep the economy flowing, it's logical, it makes sense. However, when someone says something is "worth it" we stop thinking of prices in money and start to think of them in consequences, or the results of the decisions you make. By telling someone who they are "worth it" you are telling the person that whatever happens to them as a result of being with them, being their friend, doing anything with them means more to them than any consequence that may happen. I believe that people do not know how powerful these words are.
There are many words and phrases that are used now that have lost all meaning to the people who are saying them, and unfortunately, some of us do not realize when people do not mean it. I high school, there are many people who say things without meaning it, but there are also many who are deceived by the untrue words of others. What bothers me the most though, is that when the ones who believed the words of others find out that they were lies, the state of that person is the compromised. They stop trusting people, and begin to question everything. The statement "worth it" in my opinion is the worst of all things someone could lie about because you make the person you said it to doubt that they ever were really worth it.
I cannot caution high school students enough about how many things people will say to them that they do not mean. Even though going through high school questioning everything is not the ideal scenario, I am telling you now it is a lot better than how you would feel after finding out someone who you have trusted as just been lying to you, or they changed their mind about you. As you roam the halls of your high school, creating acquaintances and hopefully some good friends, please be cautious of what you say to others. Understand that things happen and feelings change so do not promise someone something unless you are positively certain you mean it and nothing will change your opinion. Say what you mean and mean what you say. In other words, think before you speak. Words are worth thinking about before you say them. This situation will happen to you, it happens to a lot of people because there are a whole lot of people who are just fantastic people, but just start laughing and get over it. Ones who lie to you are never worth your time.
JSL

Passion.

Passion is something that is described as "strong and barely controllable" when I searched it on Google. We all have it for something, teachers have it for teaching, athletes for their sport, musicians for the feeling they get when they listen to music. All of these things are very important to the ones who have a passion for it, and that is important. People now-a-days disregard the fact that whatever they say in a derogatory manner could be overheard by someone who feels strongly about the subject. 

The worst thing someone could do is make someone feel uncomfortable about what they feel about something. To make someone feel insecure about their passion, is something that should make one stand back and reevaluate themselves, but no one ever does. So in high school, where you are surrounded by people who do not care about what they say and how it could affect others, be the one person who is constantly checking themselves. If you are that person, you will be the flower poking through the sidewalk as other students walk with their head down.

This may sound like something that would be posted on tumbler or twitter, and it probably has been. Regardless of what the person is talking about, it is marvelous to hear someone talk about something they love and are passionate about. They forget that commas exist and never stop to take a breath because they just have so much to tell you about whatever it is that they are interested in. It can not help but make you smile when someone lights up to tell you about something. If you have the chance to be the person someone seeks out to share something with, do not hesitate to listen intently. It is a humbling feeling when someone waits all day just for the chance to talk to you about something because they know that they will be able to be open and honest with you. It makes you feel like such and important person, and brightens your cloudy days. So remember, do not just laugh at someone's passion because the last thing you want to do is make someone feel bad about themselves. But if someone has a passion for comedy, then you can just start laughing.
JSL

Important People.

"You tell your mom everything?"
Yes. Of course. Why is that even surprising?
It blows my mind how many individuals are shocked when they hear that piece of information about myself. To be completely honest, it is hard sometimes, especially when I do something that I know will disappoint her, or other times when she feels the need to assist in my person struggles I face in high school, but I do not intend to stop informing her about what I am going through. I feel as if a lot of high school students do not want to tell their parents anything because of the privacy they think they are entitled to, or the fear of disappointment they think they will receive, or the fact that no one else does. Honestly, I would recommend letting your parents in on everything, they have been in high school before, they survived. They may have not been in the exact same situations you have been going through, but that does not mean that they do not know anything about high school, odds are that they know more than you give them credit for. If anything, they will be there for you to vent to and even cry to when you need them. Their opinion on how to handle any situation you are put in is probably better than your knee-jerk reaction to it, because they have the mental capacity of an adult, they can tell you the best way to handle it maturely.
Other than them being able to give you advice and sympathize with you, telling your parents everything gives you a moral compass. I believe that it makes you think twice about decisions you are making because you question what your parents would think of which one you would make. This is not a bad thing. If your parents only want what is best for you, then thinking of them in places where you could yourself into a sticky situation, would benefit you. Why would one want to learn lessons the hard way if they do not have to? Stay on good terms with your parents kids, laugh at their jokes and attempts at selfies, and maybe they will help pay for college.
JSL

Selection.

 If you have not gotten the message from my previous posts, here it is again: High school is tough. Sleep deprivation, the rising of stress and anxiety levels, and the wonderful thoughts of our peers of our every move make it quite the experience. Things that make everything worth while, however, include acing a test studied hard for, winning competitions in sports, and experiencing it all with good people, your friends. 

One thing you need to know about people in high school is that they will change. Experiences that individuals encounter define them as a person and will change who they are, it's inevitable. The may also change their relationship with you. I have had many best friends, many different types of friend groups, and also feel at times I and just floating along the timeline not tethered to anyone.  So before I explain how I believe you should select your friends, I want to establish the fact that they may not be there forever. Although that is what would be the ideal scenario which we all hope for, a lot of times this does not happen and it is good to have already accepted it. With that in mind, when choosing friends I would stay away from the ones who enjoy bringing drama with them wherever they go, the falling out with those friends will be painful and long-lasting. 

The ultimate advice I can give you to get you through high school is to surround yourself with good people. If you surround yourself with good people, who have the same goals as you and believe the same things, you will have a solid base for whenever you may stumble.  Now know that people like this are difficult to come by sometimes, but that does not mean you should ever stop looking. As an upperclassmen, I have discovered that there are few whom which I would call my dearest friends. A lot which I do not see everyday. Some have moved to other states, others have gone to college, and yet others still who I compete with in my sporting events. Having friends you talk to every day is nice, but you might not see your closest friends every day. If you do, know you are a lucky individual, not all of us are able to.  Do not get me wrong, there are plenty of people at my school which I would call my friends, but there are few who I would call and let all my problems out to. When you find someone who you can stand most of the time, make sure to hold them close, but know you or them may change as time goes on. One thing is for sure though, high school is a lot easier with your friends.

JSL

Condescension.

When talking to little kids, they do not notice when we change the way we speak in order to allow them to understand. Presenting ourselves differently does not change the way that they see us. In high school, that does not go well. First, high school students see themselves as if they know everything. Second, although maturity levels of every student vary, high school students are not children, and they still deserve respect, which means not speaking down to them. Not only does this apply to adults, but also us students ourselves.

Conversations held between a student and an adult should have the underlying understanding that the teacher has ultimate authority over the student. However, this does not mean the the adult should talk down to the student because they are talking a person who can think for themselves. Respect is very important in all conversations, and when respect is not given, the whole conversation becomes meaningless. When adults fail to give students respect, tipically, the student becomes offended and do not invest themselves in the interaction. Also, another consequence of the failure of respect given is that they will not want to talk to you again, and also not give the respect you lacked to give them.

Interactions between student and student should hardly ever be predominately one ranking higher over the other, with only a few exceptions. In high school, we all grow to be on the same field intellectually. When one talks down to someone when they are one the same intellectual level, it is rude. The reason this happens, in my opinion, is usually when one believes that they add seemingly right and all-knowing of the topic being discussed. And typically,  because we are only in our teens, this is not the case. Another observation that I have made, is that it is usually an opinion-based. In high school, a lot of students are thinking for themselves, questioning things, and forming their own opinions. When someone does not allow someone to speak their mind, by talking down to the or interrupting, it speaks volumes of their character. Regardless of whether you believe that someone is right or wrong in their opinion, you should still give them the respect they deserve. As humans we were blessed with the ability to think for ourselves. With saying that, should we not allow one to express their God-given right as an individual?

JSL

Buttons.

If someone were ever to tell me that buttons were meant to be pushed, I would get very upset with that person. Some buttons, that are can most certainly be labeled "DO NOT PRESS" and those are ones that one should not touch. Others, are only authorized to be pressed by specific people, and others yet, are meant to be slowly forgotten about. Everyone, however, has their collection of buttons.
Buttons are made when a situation happens that makes a certain subject, difficult for one to talk about. For some, when someone pushes their buttons, they become enraged and can be very vocal about whatever instance or idea was brought up. For others, the subject which was under the button pressed was something very saddening for that person and they become very distant. Regardless, with any button that was pressed, it typically ruins that individual's day. The people who go out and purposely try to press people's buttons, are terrible people. They have no idea what kind of day that person has had, and even if they think they did, what right do they have to attempt to ruin their mood? 
However, buttons can be pressed by accident. For example, when arguments arise between two people, specific buttons are found to directly hurt a person, and often, these buttons have cobwebs and have been left alone for a while, making them hurt more when they are pressed. Another time that this happens is when friends are joking around. Things are brought up that are truly intended to be laughed over, but sometimes press buttons that one did not realize had been formed. 
Now if someone pressed one of your buttons unintentionally, it is important to forgive them quickly. In most cases, they will feel awful for doing anything to upset you, and deserved to be forgiven. But in other cases, where they intentionally press certain buttons to make you upset, they have no room to be in your daily life. Buttons are formed all the time, but in order to protect yourself from button-pressers, try to get over situations as quickly as possible. Everyone has buttons, so know that it is okay if someone presses some of yours, and also be aware of what you say to others. Be sure to reference my post on sensitivity regarding that whole situation though.

JSL

Maturity.

I have referenced this term in many of my blogs, and my definition of maturity may be completely different from the next person's, but frankly, I do not care.
Maturity is an ever-changing state of being. I do not believe that someone is ever considered to be completely mature. I think that one can be mature in instances they are faced with, or grow to be more mature than they once were, but being mature is something that I do not think is something one obtains. There are certain things though, with which we must all strive to do in life.
One thing we must attempt to do is not care about the opinion of others. I do believe that we should all care a little bit, because you should always be questioning your character, but in regards to the individuals who spread false statements, one should think little of them. The saying "take it with a grain of salt" is something everyone, especially in high school, should go through life saying to themselves. There are certain opinions with which you should care about, employers, teachers, parents, the ones who will not make things up about you. The others' opinions, you should take very lightly and try to not think twice about them. As I said, maturity is something you will always aim for, so not caring is something that is very difficult in high school. Especially with the introduction of social media and whispers in the hall which are unavoidable. Its something to work at.
Another thing that you should work at is your character. We should not care what irrelevant others think of us when they have false information, but if we are constantly working at making ourselves better people, improving our character, hopefully they will have less to taunt you with. To improve your character, you must first establish your personal morals and what you stand for, which can be a whole other process itself. This is what I believe a lot of people are attempting to do in high school, find what they want to support, and what things they think are not okay. Who you really are as a person, is what you should concentrate on, not what others say. Those that I mentioned earlier, the ones whose opinions you should care about, are the ones who will not make up things about you and look at who you are based on what they have seen you done. They have reached that point on the maturity scale. I cannot emphasize how important your character is, you are the one in control of it and you should be your biggest critic of it. After you establish who you want to be, making decisions will become so much easier to make.
Different situations require different levels of appropriateness. Something one needs to work on when attempting to be mature is knowing where the line is in the situations they are presented with. Some may call it "having a filter", but knowing what is and is not okay to say in certain interactions is a big step in maturity.
Overall, if someone is actively attempting to be a better person and become more mature, they are one step ahead of everyone around them that are not. These people are few and far between in high school in my opinion, but that should not stop you from attempting to be one.
JSL

Popularity.

The idea of "popularity" probably was seeded into our minds as we entered middle school. There was the "group" that everyone wanted to be in. In my case, the group of girls that all came from the same elementary and all the ones all the boys liked. As we morphed and changed into high school students, so did the definition of "popularity". Personally, I believe that the term means something different for everyone and thankfully becomes less and less prevalent in our day-to-day lives as we age.
In order for the term "popular" to have a meaning, a person, a group, a goal in mind has to be labeled as something you want to be or fit into. Some may think that the more friends you have makes you popular. Others may think its the specific group of friends you have. Yet, others still may think that it is the number of parties you get invited to. It is different for everyone. Whatever the definition of it is for you, try to not give it much thought. As an upperclassmen, something that I can tell freshmen to look forward to is that with the more experiences you have in high school, the less and less you will care about what others have to say about you. And the few friends you may have, are most likely some of the best people you will ever meet and are way better than a huge group of them.
When you enter as a freshmen, do not change yourself to fit into the groups you want to be in, make your own group. Allow the natural forces to bring good people towards you, and stick with them. "Popularity" is something we all aim for at some point in our lives, but the sooner you realize that it is irrelevant in your high school career the better off you will be.
JSL

Weeds.

Pesky things. Annoying things that show up long after you think that you have gotten rid of long ago. You use everything you can think of to prevent the determined ones from reappearing. Pesticides, pulling them by the roots, putting your plants in good soil to prevent them from seeding, but sometimes they still pop up.
There are numerous things in high school that can be compared to weeds, bad scores on tests that haunt you at the end of the term, the dumb decision you made at a party, the last guy you dated or talked to, rumors that refuse to die. When any of these things bud once again, it tends to ruin your day. Some are able to take it like a grain of salt, pull it out, and keep on gardening. Others, including myself, tend to dwell on these things and allow it to damper the beauty of your flowers. Even after it is pulled out, the hole where it was rooted is a constant reminder for the rest of the day that it was there. People were talking about it, and it is never a good feeling knowing that others were speaking of you behind your back and it was not in the best light. Often, these weeds come up because they are the tool of some individuals to drain your day, your pretty flowers of their colors.
I picture something like this:
Your neighbor sees you hard at work on your magnificent garden. They turn around and look at theirs to see that it is okay, nothing too spectacular but not too shabby. Then suddenly. they see the green on their thumb spreading, up their arms until they are engulfed in the green of envy. They want your garden, but they can not have it. Faced with this dilemma, they think of the next best solution, if they can not have your garden, they will ruin yours until theirs is better by comparison. Not wanting to be caught red-handed, they think of ways that will slowly eat away at your garden's beauty. Weeds. Tossing them over the fence every time they get a chance. The next thing your neighbor does is they sit back and watch the destruction take place.
This is what people in high school are doing when they bring up things from their past. They just want to ruin your day, ruin the image others have of you in their mind. Do not let them. Just pull out those weeds, and continue on. Now as badly as you may want to throw them back over the fence, it is probably not worth it. Be the bigger person, their garden is probably pitiful in comparison anyways and they need all the help they can get.
JSL

How to treat bad people.

"Bad people" is not necessarily the right term, but others who speak poorly of you, ones who are purposely hurtful to you or your friends, are not good people in my opinion. In high school, you will come across many of these delightful individuals who you will hear speaking poorly of you but then smiling at you the next hour. The fascinating thing about these individuals is that they have learned to have the best looking masks ever. When they smile and have a conversation with you, complimenting your outfit or better yet, speaking poorly of yet another person to you, as if they put their trust in you not to say anything, they can be truly convincing. This is yet another thing that makes high school the terrifying experience it is, can you every really know who a person is, or are you just seeing a mask? Once I figure out how to see through them I will let you know.
How are we supposed to treat these masked people? Situations will arise when people tell you of what someone said about you, usually to cause drama, but then you can see the outline of the mask of that particular person. The conscience in the back of my brain that I never want to listen to in these situations is telling me to "shower them in kindness". On the other hand, my first instinct is to give them my best glare from across the room and make sure they feel terrible about what they have done. I am here to inform you of how poorly that technique works. The masked individuals, once you can see their actual faces are hungry for drama and the knee-jerk reaction you give them is what they want. Ultimately, the best way to handle a situation where you learn of someone speaking poorly of you is to just start laughing, and feel bad for them. The reason you should feel bad for them is because they were jealous of you, or were bored with their own lives and not focusing on more important things.
But when is something someone has done or said to others too hurtful to do everything you can to distance yourself with them. If something one has done to you or your reputation that is that terrible, my only recommendation is that you act civil and avoid the reaction they want from you. Hopefully they will move on, find a new hobby, like knitting.
There are many derogatory names girls get called behind their backs. "Flirts" and "Teases" being amongst them. I think these are the worst labels you could give a person. Calling an individual one of these names is not only damaging their character as seen by others when one speaking of someone who way, but it is directly tarnishing the way someone is. Often, these girls may just be energetic and fun people, who like to and are able to socialize. Once these girls find out about these false allegations about themselves being passed from one of their peers to the next, what are they to do? Stop being themselves? Start acting reserved and antisocial? Personally, when I hear about a rumor spreading about me I do my best to prove them wrong in whatever it is. However, in this situation there is no right way to handle it. Doing the right thing and showering the person speaking ill of you only justifies their rumor of you being a flirt, because they are too immature to be able to tell the difference.
Rumors suck.
Luckily, in high school we are blessed to be around immature people all day who just love to spread them. What a joy. regardless of what others think of you, do not let it change you as a person. Not everyone will have something bad to say about you, even if it may feel that way. Stick through it, just be nice, and keep on laughing because you can.
JSL